Freedom From Religious Persecution

(c) Darrell Godliman - Flickr

The United States was originally founded because the first immigrants from Europe were searching for freedom from religious persecution.  How fitting that today, hundreds of years later, their descendants are persecuting others based on that same religion.

As a gay man, I have limited rights in the country I was born despite the fact that the founding fathers declared America a land where “all men are created equal.”  Of course, as we all know, this doesn’t apply if you happen to love someone of the same sex.  Or so the religious extremists would have you believe.

While the scenery is changing and gradually improving for same-sex couples in America, there is still much work to do.  I will write another post with more details another day, however items such as immigration rights are among the most depressing rights denied to same-sex couples.  Heterosexual married couples are granted 1,138 rights and responsibilities nearly all of which are denied to same-sex coupoles who have gotten married in the few states which have passed full marriage equality as these marriages are severely crippled due to DOMA, a federal law which defines marriage as being between one man and one woman.  This backwards-thinking law denies almost all of the 1,138 rights and responsibilities regardless of whether you are legally married but happen to be same-sex.

For Justin and I, the largest issue is immigration rights.  Although we have been a committed couple for almost four and a half years and despite the fact that we have countless finances proving this and have co-signed on the purchase of a car, the rental of a house for over two years and have many friends and family who can clearly see the love we have for each other, I have zero rights to be able to keep Justin in this country.  The only way he can legally stay is if he happens to find an employer who would sponsor him for a visa and eventually a green-card.  This to me is a serious crime and a major slap in the face.  ”All men are created equal.”

Unless you’re gay – then you can be stepped on and constantly told, by those who previously nurtured and cared for you before they knew you were gay, that you are nothing and that you deserve no rights – that your love of someone of the same sex is a “choice.”  Yes, you are right.  I prefer to be treated as a second class citizen.  I prefer to have rights ripped from me daily.  I prefer to be turned away when doing something as simple as donating my blood to those in need.  I prefer to be constantly told by my state and my country that my love for another man is disgusting and despicable.  I prefer to be called a “faggot” when walking down the street with my boyfriend.    I prefer to be unable to keep the person I love in this country.

Shanghai – The First Few Days

Justin and I are a few days in on our China 2011 trip.  While this trip is the first for both of us to get to visit Shanghai, the main purpose of this trip is two-fold.  One, it has been three years since he was able to visit his family so it’s time to reconnect and visit with some of his friends.  Second, and pretty importantly, he is coming out to his mom and dad and by extension (and inevitable gossip) – the rest of his family.

Well, two days ago – the day after we arrived and the same day his mom arrived in Shanghai – he came out to his mom.  It actually went great and significantly better than it would have for most Chinese guys.  Typically the families are very set in their ways and would usually think about how it’s bad for the family’s face or possibly that they would not have anyone to take care of them when they’re older.  His mom however is very forward-thinking about was great with the news.  She asked tons of questions such as if I was what had turned him gay.  He re-assured her I wasn’t and that he had crushes on other guys long before he met me.

Since we are all an extended family now, we have roamed around Shanghai together and with various friends.  The pictures below are from the past few days and are a small selection of the places we have been.

A Peek Into The Subconscious

© Salbjörg Rita Jónsdóttir, Flickr

The last few nights I’ve actually remembered a few dreams that I’ve had. I used to remember some of them years ago, but haven’t remembered anything after I woke up for many years now.

While I was a bit sad about that, it did give me the ability to sleep through an entire night and wake up with a fresh mind. The past two nights though have been different. Last night I had a dream that was creepy, but Tuesday night’s dream is what stands out in my mind.

In the dream, for some reason I was in a computer store to have my netbook repaired (I work on computers all the time and would very rarely ever take it in somewhere and let anyone else work on my technology). I’m not sure why exactly, but somehow it came up that I was gay and the woman at the counter refused to give me service. It’s pretty vague since it was just a dream, but she said something to another person about how she made her views clear at their last meeting. The other person tried to comfort me since I was visibly upset and I was about to cry. I think it was about then that I woke up.

While that’s pretty disjointed and lacking lots of details, it was an interesting insight into my subconscious. At least consciously I don’t consider myself to be discriminated against at least in certain areas. I definitely am by the government, but never have been by any business or by any specific person. It showed me that although I am not being actively discriminated against personally, that it is still something very much on my mind and was eye-opening.

Dreams provide us with an opportunity to let the mind run free with ideas uninhibited by moral, ethical and social constraints. They allow us to explore anything and everything that could possibly be thought of. While sometimes these can he horrifying or amazingly magical, sometimes they are instead about ideas that hold much deeper meaning and, if you’re lucky enough to remember those dreams once you’ve woken up, can show you more about yourself than you ever realized existed.

DADT Repeal

Yesterday marked the official repeal of Don’t Ask Don’t Tell, the US Millitary’s ban on gay servicemen from serving openly.  Above is a video produced by one military man (Randy Phillips) coming out to his Dad yesterday.

http://www.towleroad.com/2011/09/airmanfollow.html

The Sanctity of Traditional Marriage

Quick post to display an infographic I found via a blog I follow.  Religious extremists like to state that allowing marriage equality (which doesn’t mean a holy marriage but rather a civil that grants all of the same rights and responsibilities) will be going against “traditional” marriage.  Let’s take a look at “traditional” marriage through the ages…

Source: UnicornBooty.com